its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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