Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
