it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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