what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
