You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Screwed.edu
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
