i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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