worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
