This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
