I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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