wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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