why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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