i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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