Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
he shaved USA in his pubs
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
