make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
