we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
