Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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