I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
