How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
