Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
