Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
