is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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