There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
