Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
