why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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