one might say we're banned from that church
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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