I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
