my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
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