I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
