Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
