Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
