Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
