Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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