I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
