you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
