Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
