Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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