I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
