its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
