God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
