Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
