I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize