no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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