Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
