CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
BRING THE BAGELS
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
