Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
