I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize