Is it normal to miss your booty call?
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize