i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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