Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Randomize
