How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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